Thursday, January 25, 2007
at some point today, something suddenly worries me. if i were to stop flying, and gab continues, will we live seperate lives?
cute squishie -x
Monday, January 22, 2007
something struck my mind today. now that i have erm, better salary, it also mean i can pamper my family and mr lin better. one day, when i step down to a ALOT lesser amount pay slip, even if im contented, how to pamper the rest ar? ah! haha! does that mean mr lin and my family will have to pamper me all over again? *teeheehee* *grabs stomach and laugh hard*
cute squishie -x
the night's hang out at pearly was nice. and somehow, pearly said something that i would remember and will have to accept. sharing it with you girls was a right thing to do because i never want to have others thinking or getting the wrong message being put across. and i was really happy no judgements was made even though i said alot. oh well, im being paranoid.
im glad that year 06 passed really fast. so many things happened that if you were to ask me to recall, i could, with every little detail attached. from going to interviews starting from 09/2005, dragging all the way to confirming my employment in 01/2006 and a nightout getting to know gabriel. afterwhich, weeks later, being with gabriel. everything's been quite smooth so far (not really on the work part though, but gabriel, family and friends) with just the slightest hiccups here and there.
oh well, gab's been very nice. even on times when he is very fierce, he still turns out to be quite lovable after a while. i know i like to irritate him because thats the only way im left to bully him what! tell me in what way will i ever be fiercer than him? anyway, he said he needed someone to bully him (if you would deny mr lin, go and read your own blog. you would just have to agree with me in the end cos that was what you typed!) *hah!* so instead, i always try to disturb this boy until he says "baby, shut-up" or "baby, pls dont talk so loud. everyone can hear you now". i make alot of noise, try to talk about irrelevant.weird stuffs and ask many many stupid/paranoid questions (as of what he claims. but i swear i nv thought they were silly questions) i know all of you are thinking im very bo liao. but pearly is worse! she wakes ian up in the middle of the night by jumping on the bed shouting, "FIRE FIRE!!!" tell me now, who's better at irritating? oops! sorry pearly! hahaha.
i just hope to have more time with my boy. if pearly can call 5 days "hell", you should read what i have to say. i really dont like to have both of us coming back and rushing off to go somewhere else far away. i dont like to know that im only left with 1 and a 1/2 day (the other 1/2 day is spent packing for a flight and getting ready for it) to spend with him after a 8 days or more flight, spending 1/2 day together then get called up for a flight. it's like i have a boyfriend, but he is all over the world. i dont feel settled/steady. i have a very playful job that requires no brain.
all these stinks so i pray that the decision for me to quit would put all these feelings to a halt and that the decision is right. there's so much about and into this relationship so i'll just stop here. but i love the man i like. and i hope he sees what i see, understands how i feel and feel as much as me or even more. i know we'll work hard to make everything possible between us because i have faith in him and myself.
family. at least for now, nothing is better than how it already is. watching my parents age, especially my dad, makes me wanna quit very very soon so that he wouldnt miss me that much whenever i stay over at gab's. i could always hear him sad when he calls me to ask when im coming home. SO SAD RIGHT?! *mr lin, move over to cck pls?*
friends. i said above that i feel so so so comfortable sharing with you girls anything. what have we not tried? from sharing the same toilet cubicle altogether to changing right infront of each other, from laughing at something to laughing at nothing. i know i can say just anything, be myself, and still be very much supported in a way or another. im stuck to you girls, for life. im amazed, amused and proud of ourselves. many many years of good friendship to come darlings~
short conversation with yingy about my birthday made me kinda pause for a while because, i didnt really planned anything. surprisingly, it didnt seem that important even though it is the one and only 21st. i once said happily to gabriel "im turning 21 this year!" and it actually felt weird cos i was the one getting excited but he was like waaaayyyyyy past that age so he couldnt react like me. hahahaha. it was a funny sight. well, as usual, birthdays comes with loved ones arriving at your door, chit-chatting, having candles on the cake symbolising number twenty-one, singing the birthday song, blowing of candles, eating of cake then goodnight and byebye, i'll see you next year and we'll do the same thing again. always the same isnt it? so, nothing to get really excited about i guess....... (except ang baos and presents. *evil grin*) so erm....can i....erm.... can i list my wishlist now pls? dang! i paused for a moment again. guess what? I DONT EVEN HAVE A WISHLIST IN MY HEAD!!!!! and how can this be?!?! im very sure im greedy!!! hahahaha. i like surprises better.
oh oh! but i just thought of what to do for mr lin and i when we reach our very first year together and im very very very excited about it! boohoohoo~ another round of hole in the pocket. keke.
cute squishie -x
